K-Rad's Amnesty Day

Today I have decided to forgive anyone who has intentionally or unintentionally hurt me phyiscally or emotionally between 1971-2003. It covers every hurt that I can remember currently...repressed memories are ineligible for this blanket amnesty. Anyone who has intentionally or unintentionally hurt me from 01/01/2004 to the present may have to wait for the next amnesty period. The current waiting period is 34 years, however applications for amnesty are available on request, and each applicant will be reviewed on a case by case basis.

DISCLAIMER: I can change my mind at any given moment and resend my forgiveness at the mere drop of the hat, if deemed necessary by me and only me.

Not valid with any other coupons or offers.

I'm Good Enough, I'm Smart Enough, and Doggone It, People Like Me!

While talking with some friends the other day, I was whinning about some poor choices I feel my mother made while I was growing up, and the fact that now that she has moved on from this world, I don't even get to fuss at her about how disfunctional those choices have made me, and how different my life would have been had she chose differently. One of my friends asked me how my life would be different. That simple question has made me re-think my anger, resentment and judgment of my mother's choices. I am a dependable, independent, individual with a free spirit and a lack of tolerance for violence of any kind, with a deep compassionate understanding and empathy for those less fortunate than I, and as the very same friend pointed out to me that same evening, quick to become indignant when I feel an injustice has occured. I like all that about me. Those are qualities I might not have, had my mother made different choices. So, a great big thank you goes out to my friend, my mom, and also to Stuart Smiley.

OCD or ADD?

Just today, the reason for my often chaotic life has become clear. I have known for some time that I have a least a mild case of Attention Deficit Disorder. Someone sent me a funny email a few years back that tells the story of a woman who begins a project in the morining, only to be distracted by another project, then that is distracted by another immediate need, which is then distacted by another issue, and so on... until at the end of the day, she gets back to the original unfinished project, only to wonder why she's too exhausted to continue, because she feels she nothing was accomplished all day. I found that story describes me pretty well some days.
Now, consider this. I have come to realize that when I do sit down to focus on a task at hand, I find I have obsessive compulsive tendencies. I have been known to alphabetize, by category, my canned goods and also my CD's. I categorize all my hanging clothes by type, then style then color, shoes are categorized by color, then by style.
Today, I realized that my ADD and OCD are continually at odds with each other. When life is running smoothly, my OCD kicks in, and all is right with the world. However, during an emotionally rough period, or even just a very busy week or so, my OCD goes out the window, ADD kicks into high gear, and I am lucky if I can find the pair of shoes I am looking for... usually buried under any number of piles of clothes that have collected throughout the house. My ADD also keeps me from following through to keep things as organized as I like them. I'll set it up perfectly, where everything has a place, but things never seem to find their way back to their proper home. I think perhaps it has to do with that whole discipline thing I seem to lack.

I think will try to make a concerted effort to put some discipline and structure in my life.

Check back with me to see if I follow through with that!

Happy Anniversary

It was a year ago today since we lost the election. One down, three more to go. Things are looking rather bleak... do you think we can survive three more years of Bush??

Let's all send out lots of love and light, and hope for better things to come.

I'm off to have a beer.